As a longtime practitioner of tease and denial (both giving and receiving, on film and in my personal life) I’ve realized that being able to choose when you come helps you not just in terms of obeying a master or mistress, but in more traditional aspects of your sex life as well. The ability to do so takes the sort of practice that tease and denial or edging yourself can prepare you for.
“Edging” (not to be confused with edge play) is the practice of taking yourself to the brink of orgasm and then backing down just before you come. In doing so, you maintain a high level of sexual arousal for an extended period of time and when you do finally have an orgasm, it can be very intense.
Chances are, you guys already partake in “gentleman’s time”, so edging while you are doing it isn’t too large of a leap. If you want to see results, you have to put the time in and keep a few things in mind:
If you intend to go the distance you’ll need to reapply at some point and hunting for it will distract you in the moment. Choose a lubricant that doesn’t break down too quickly or become sticky (I’m a fan of Pjur Aqua). Only use something that’s actually intended for this sort of thing; using lotion (or soap in the shower) can actually cause skin issues that can end up being quite severe. Attempting to edge dry can cause chaffing; if you prefer a slightly more masochistic approach then perhaps that’s not a big deal, but I recommend that you use lubrication.
Time It Right
Choose a time and place where you can focus with no interruptions or distractions. If you want to really learn how to make it last, you shouldn’t worry yourself over having to abruptly wrap things up. Setting a time limit is fine though and tracking measurable results will be easier for some people.
Bring A Toy
Toys will make this even more challenging and enjoyable; a variable speed vibrator works very well for both men and women because it’ll stimulate you in a very different way than when it happens manually. The VibeRite wand has lots of speed options and is pretty gender neutral, so even if the idea of buying a vibrator for yourself is intimidating for some of you guys, you can find something approachable that won’t make you feel like you are sword fighting. You can also try toys like the Tantus vibrating cock ring or any number of anal toys (if it seems taboo to you it’ll probably add to the thrill, or it least it does for me).
Play With The Senses
If you’d like to make the experience a little kinkier, you can include restraints, blindfolds or plugs into your edging sessions. For many people the sense of touch is heightened when you take away the sense of sound or sight, so adding sensory deprivation to your session may make even more enjoyable. Adult films can also make this more of a challenge; pop in your favorite scene and see what it’s like to try and keep control while all your buttons are being pressed.
Your goal in edging yourself is to get as close to orgasm as possible, but in the beginning that might be difficult to judge, so I recommend in the beginning that you take yourself about three quarters of the way to orgasm and come to a stop. Put your hands in the air and hold them there. Count to thirty before you touch yourself again, and push little closer the next time around. Do this over and over again, but take care not to ruin your own orgasm!
Slow It Down
From personal experience I can tell you guys that methods such as flicking or pinching the tip that will sober your cock up a bit. For others, ice is a good solution. Learning to tighten your PC muscles with Kegel exercises will also help you stop when things are happening too fast. Don’t underestimate the ability of the mind to find a solution to cool you down too; find something that’ll bring you back down to earth without completely ruining the mood.
Bring A Friend
If you want to try edging yourself during sex with a partner, stop when you are close to coming and focus completely on their pleasure. Using some cooling down time to focus on the person(s) you are in bed with can give you an opportunity to collect yourself. Sex isn’t (necessarily) a marathon, but it should last for as long as you want it to without coming to an abrupt end. Edging is a great way to improve your ability to do that.
Having someone else edge you can be fun as well; Athena Fatale gave some great suggestions in her post about tease and denial that can be put to use in edging with a partner, so I suggest you give it a read. She also gave some great toy recommendations that you can use either alone or with a partner.
Whether it is for self-satisfaction or to be a better lover, edging is a good way to give greater purpose to masturbation. The result is worth the effort and you’ll enjoy the process as well.
Last week the gorgeous Athena Fatale graced us with her musings on teasing aspect of tease and denial. This week, she finishes it off with some thoughts and hints on denial. Will it be a happy ending, or a frustrating brush off? Read on for the thrilling conclusion!
Do you ever want something so bad you can’t stand it? You fantasize about it and obsess over it, it consumes your every thought and motivates your every action until finally, at long last, you either achieve success or suffer a crushing defeat. If you reach your goal, the satisfaction is so sweet that you can revel in it for days, replaying the moment in your mind and reliving the victory over and over. A crushing defeat can heighten your determination to be successful in your next venture, pushing you to greater and more satisfying accomplishments that far surpassed your original goal.
Sex can be much the same way. Whether you are enjoying sex alone or with a partner, or partners, a little tease and denial really ratchets up the intensity. We are sexual creatures, and once our senses are aroused it is hard to turn back. Anyone who’s ever heard a boy carry on about ‘blue balls’ knows that they certainly don’t enjoy turning back. That doesn’t mean you can’t have fun insisting they do! As a Dominatrix, I find that there is little my slaves won’t do if they think there might be a chance for an orgasm in their future. Sometimes I like to play a little game where I make my slave stroke himself to the brink of orgasm then stop abruptly and assume the position for 20 strokes with the cane, with additional strikes given for whining or complaining. We repeat this until I am satisfied he can no longer take any more, and I most likely send him on his way with a swollen ass and swollen, aching balls. This is great fun for me, a sadistic game of give and take for my own personal amusement.
Tease and denial can be quite sadistic even without the added caning. Is there anything worse than being on the verge of orgasm but unable to achieve climax? I think not. Vibrators can be just the thing to push you or your partner over the edge, or in this case just close enough to almost go over… but not until you say so. One of my favorite vibrators on the market right now is the VibeRite from KinkLab. It’s incredibly powerful and offers 7 speed settings so you can control just how much, or how little vibration your partner receives. Use it externally to warm things up, then add one of the attachments that provide G-spot or P-spot stimulation to take the sexual intensity to the next level. Many people can climax quickly with a VibeRite, so switch to a low setting and light strokes to prevent an unintended orgasm.
Just the tip, he says? We’ve all heard that before. Now thanks to the Cobra Libre by Fun Factory,’just the tip’ is all he’ll get! This male masturbator is designed to stimulate the most sensitive part of the penis – the head. Use the vibration settings to work your partner in to a frustrated frenzy then negotiate your terms for letting them release. Since this toy is specifically designed to stimulate only the glans and the frenulum, it leaves the lower shaft and testicles free for additional stimulation. Whether that additional stimulation is painful or pleasurable depends on you. Use your hands and mouth if you’re feeling nice, or add some clothespins or a prickly Wartenberg Pinwheel if you’re not! Mix it up to keep your partner on their toes and ready to explode from frustration.
Tips for delaying or denying orgasm:
• Monitor breathing and body language. Watch for signs of pleasure and allow positive reactions to continue for brief periods of time and increase in intensity, but stop before climax is reached. Ask your partner to verbally communicate when they are close to orgasm if needed.
• Have your partner rate their arousal on a scale of 1-10, with 10 being an orgasm. Instruct them to masturbate themselves to a 7 before stopping, then an 8, then 9. Each time they come closer to their goal it becomes more and more frustrating, and increasingly difficult to stop. Sexual frustration is the name of this game. Enjoy it, you sick bastard.
• Bondage is perfect for tease and denial. Tie your partner to the bed and use a vibrator or masturbator to bring them close to orgasm, then stop and make them beg for more. Better yet, make them earn it!
• When incorporating rope bondage in your tease and denial play, give your partner just enough slack to masturbate with one hand. When they get close to orgasm, pull the rope taught so that they can no longer reach their fun parts. Laughing at their discomfort is optional.
• Counter an approaching orgasm with a shock to the system. Ice cubes, nipple clamps, a wooden paddle – all of these things can disrupt the pleasure of sensory overload and ruin an orgasm before it’s time.
• Assign your partner a task to complete when they are close to orgasm. It’s hard to climax when you have to recite the Pledge Of Allegiance, or sing the Star Spangled Banner.
It’s human nature to want what we can’t have, and there is nothing we want more than sexual gratification. A greedy pig will gobble up whatever is in front of him without ever taking the time to really appreciate what he has. Your orgasm is the food that nourishes you; take your time and enjoy it to it’s fullest. Savor each delicious bite, let it fill every inch of your body. Because if you don’t eat your dinner, someone just might take it away.
In burlesque, the art of the tease is what matters most. It is a long, slow courtship between the performer and the audience she is seducing. She offers a little peek here, a quick flash there. She gives you a taste then takes it away and leaves you wanting more. This dance is a sort of tease and denial, a lusty give-and-take that continues until finally the climax is reached and the audience cannot help but explode with satisfaction. If we take the same approach to our orgasms, the results can be quite explosive indeed. As they say, good things come to those who wait.
You’ve probably heard of a little thing called foreplay. It’s what happens before sex. This is the ‘tease’ part of ‘tease and denial’ and serves more purpose than just achieving erection or vaginal lubrication. It’s what gets us hot and bothered and sets the stage for a truly earth shattering orgasm. Foreplay is also crucial to many female orgasms, so don’t be stingy when it comes to pleasing the ladies. Oral sex and manual masturbation are always great for getting things started but to really prolong the pleasure, and spare your jaw in the process, you can incorporate a number of sex toys for both men and women.
Vibrators make fantastic tease toys. Whether you are teasing your partner or pleasing yourself, start with your vibrator on a low setting and lightly caress near the vagina or perineum to get things started. Experiment with different angles, speeds, and pressures as well as specific points on and around the genitals, nipples and anus. Vibrators that feature multiple vibration patterns like the Lelo Mona Red or the Laya Spot by Fun Factory are ideal for sexual teasing and allow you to quickly change things up if you find yourself or your partner approaching orgasm too quickly. The Oh MiBod iPod Vibrator syncs to your iPod and will pulse to the beat of your favorite music, so a good playlist can alter the vibrations for you if you’re flying solo.
Male masturbation sleeves offer a bit more for those taking the ‘hands on’ approach to orgasm achievement. These soft, textured sleeves are designed to enhance manual masturbation by recreating the sensation of vaginal or anal penetration. Slip in to a Titanmen Tool Box
or a textured Vibratex Suction Sleeve
and stroke yourself or your partner slowly and gently. More endowed men may prefer the extra girth and length of the Tantus Stroker XL
. Vary your grip strength and stroke speed until breathing quickens, then switch to slow, loose strokes to prevent any pre-intended ejaculations. Patience is the name of the game in tease and denial play, and a good tease is a slow tease.
Tips for teasing with toys:
• Always start slow and increase gradually. Try different speeds, strengths, vibration patterns, etc to find what drives you wild, then treat yourself to a few seconds of pure pleasure before switching techniques or moving to another area. Bring yourself (or your partner) slightly closer to orgasm each time without climaxing.
• When teasing a partner, monitor their body language to gauge their reactions to your manipulations. Rapid or heavy breathing, clenched fingers, curled toes, an arched back or even a tilted pelvis can all be signs of an approaching orgasm. Listen for audible clues like moaning or other verbal communications.
• When using vibrators, use a series of quick, light passes over the clitoris or frenulum intermixed with long, slow, heavy strokes and firmer pressure to stimulate the genitals and heighten arousal. Allow the sensations to build gradually for more intensity.
• Vary sensations and erogenous zones. Add in some spanking or nipple play to keep things lively. A little pain intensifies the pleasure!
• Blindfolds are perfect for teasing scenarios. The heightened senses and lack of control increase sexual arousal and add a sense of mystery to your orgasmic journey.
• Add some bondage to your foreplay! There is nothing more frustrating and exciting than to be at the mercy of a lover who is taking their time, pleasing you slowly, making you beg to release your sexual tension, bringing you close to orgasm time and time again but never quite letting you climax until they decide you are ready.
Which brings us to the agony and ecstasy of denial. But more on that next week. You’ll just have to wait to find out what I have in store for you…
Get your hands on all the implements you’ll need to celebrate National Masturbation Month – and save up to 50% off on vibrators, cock toys, lube and more!
Masturbation, n. – 1. 1. The stimulation, usually by hand, of one’s genitals for sexual pleasure; the action or practice of masturbating oneself or (less commonly) another person; an instance of this.
-Oxford English Dictionary
Let no one say we do not strive to be less common! Mondays in May are for exploring the boundaries of mutual pleasure. Often, games of touchy-feely are thrown by the wayside in the throes of passion, but let’s not be over-hasty. Whether you’re just getting to know someone or seek to travel new avenues of pleasing one another, we’ve put together this handy road map to try to keep you from getting lost (though admittedly that’s fun sometimes, too!)
This Above All: To Thine Own Self Be True
Knowing how to please yourself is important, but so is being able to communicate what pleases you to your partner. Start off with how and where you like to be touched. Sometimes it’s easier to show, not tell. Put their hand on top of yours so they can feel how hard and fast you like it. If you’re experiencing discomfort or too much friction, put your hand on top of theirs as they touch you to guide them. consider using a silicone or water based lube to ensure your comfort.
Take the Road Less Traveled
Don’t be afraid to let your partner experiment on you. You can’t tickle yourself, and likewise, you may discover unsuspected pleasure in surprising new places if you let their hands roam a little. Likewise, don’t be afraid to boldly explore everywhere, but remember to be gentle in your ministrations. Look and listen to your partner’s reactions for clues about the best way to maximize their enjoyment!
What’s Good for the Goose is Good for the…Other Goose
A good place to start is with what you like for yourself. Use a speed and rhythm you’re comfortable with. Treat it like a dance, where one partner leads and the other matches them. Try not to step on one another’s er…toes!
Desire and pleasure are two way streets, and need signs and we all need signs and signals to guide us. “Faster.” “More Intense.” “Slower.” “Softer.” “Right there.” “Don’t stop!” Don’t be afraid of communicating what you like and, most importantly, what you don’t.
Don’t Be Afraid To Diversify
Toys and gear are great to add to your mutual exploration. Bring some of your favorites for your partner to use on you, or ask to see their toy drawer. Try a toy that accessorizes your technique, like the Toy Two Finger Extender, or one of the Tenga Egg Masturbators.
There are as many ways to please your partner as there are to please yourself. Don’t get too hung up on particulars, just be attentive and enthusiastic, and good times are sure to follow. When in doubt, don’t forget these simple directions: Get excited, get creative, and get off!
About a year ago, a few of my rowdy Texas girlfriends and I were gathered at a beachfront hotel for a friend’s wedding. As we lay in bed after the rehearsal dinner the drunken banter commenced, and by morning the ‘John Denver’ was born. What is a ‘John Denver’, you ask?
It turns out my friend (who has spectacular tits, made for hot dogging) enjoys boob sex so much that, as she said, “I thought titty fucking was like John Denver, who doesn’t love it??” We might have forgotten that golden nugget of information had she not awakened us, bright and early, with John Denver’s Greatest Hits. Within a week of returning home she had tattooed ‘John Denver’ in a delicate and graceful script right in the curve of her cleavage. Now that’s commitment!
Partialism – sexual interest in specific body parts – is quite common. Everyone has body parts, they are each as unique as the individual and can be quite fascinating. I myself have a bit of a nipple fetish. Anyone who has ever stepped in to my dungeon, or my bed, knows this. Nipples are like happy little joy magnets, drawing me to them and begging me to pinch them, squeeze them, slap them, scratch them, pierce them, poke them, twist them, lick them, bite them, suck them, tickle them. I cannot keep my hands, and sometimes mouth, off of them.
Foot fetish is arguably the most common body part fetish we indulge ourselves in, myself included. It’s one of my most frequent requests as a Dominatrix, and I sometimes attend foot fetish parties where lucky subs get the chance to worship my perfectly pedicured feet. Some of my favorite sexual memories involve a boyfriend with a serious foot fetish. I could drive him wild and give him a raging hard on in a crowded restaurant just by slipping off my shoe and placing my foot on the seat in between his legs. I didn’t even have to touch him, just my foot being there did the trick. But of course I did touch him! It made for great public tease and denial scenes, and even better foreplay. The frustration he suffered was so intense he could barely stand it and I loved every sexually agonizing minute. The drive home was always fast and furious. During sex he would stop and scold me if my feet weren’t constantly touching him, and it was hot. His fetish for my feet drove my arousal, as did the power that “The Twins” had over him. It was intoxicating.
Fetishes for certain body types are quite common as well. In a world where ‘thin is in’ and clothing sizes are available in 00 (because apparently you really can be less than zero) big girls reign supreme. Adipophilia or ‘fat fetish’ is strong attraction to overweight or obese people. A quick internet search reveals no shortage of forums and websites devoted to BBWs and those who worship them. As one commenter puts it, “For me it is a dream come true. I love to be with a big woman and be able to show her off and let the other men drool as they only have stick chicks.” Indeed I’ve heard several of my male friends lament the discomfort of being stabbed mid-coitus by the jutting hips or pelvic bones of a skinny girl, or feeling like they might break her, literally.
Now, thanks to the help of some very thoughtful porn stars, you can indulge in your favorite body oriented fetish fantasies! In the mood for a good old fashioned John Denver? Pitch your tent between Kim Williams’ 36DD peaks for a Rocky Mountain high. Sandal season got your foot fetish in a frenzy? Slip yourself in to the soft arches of Justine Joli’s size 6.5 feet and let her pretty pink toes stroke you to satisfaction. Bury yourself in April Flores’ big beautiful pussy, or spend the night sneaking in transsexual superstar Wendy Williams’ back door. Have a ball! It’s Masturbation Month, embrace your sexual fetish.
Shop our Masturbation Month Sale and find your perfect toy today!
Let’s not beat around the bush: It’s time to talk about your clitoris.
International clitorally-focused charity Clitoraid formed in 2004 is a group attempting to spread information about the barbaric tradition of female circumcision. Aiming to build a hospital in Burkina Faso, Africa in order to provide free reconstructive genital surgery and rehabilitation to all FGM victims, they are spreading the good word about the little man in the boat this week in honor of the launch of their first annual International Clitoris Awareness Week, and who are we to miss a chance to point a finger (or tongue, or well-crafted toy) at this oft-misunderstood cleft dweller.
Let’s start off with some clit facts to help avoid a clit-astrophe:
1) The clitoris is more than just a little button. It’s actually a complicated series of nerve endings that extend deep inside the body – up to 8 inches!
2) The clitoris contains more nerve endings than any other part of the human body, estimated at more than 8,000!
3) The laughing hyena has a complex relationship with her clitoris: Urinating, mating, and giving birth through a well-developed version of the organ!
In honor of International Clitoris Week and as part of our larger Masturbation Month festivities, we’re inviting you to experience the joy of this complex pleasure point. Take a gander at a few of our favorite clit-centric sex toys, vibrators, and devices on sale now.
The Micro Finger Tingler: This dainty little diddler fits directly on your prefered digit to direct soothing vibrations to the cherry atop your cupcake. Regularly priced at $20.00 on sale now for $16.00.
The Sqweel 2: Our perennial favorite paddlewheel is a whirling dervish of delight sure to send you spinning into orbit. Regularly priced at $59.99 on sale now for $47.99.
Black Pearl Vibrating Bullet: The rarest of beauties, this soft coated multi-speed bullet is sure to have you pearl diving again and again. Regularly priced at $13.99 on sale now for $6.99.
Venus Butterfly Massager: This elastic banded labial lepidopteran is also adept at coaxing nectar from your flower. Regularly priced at $19.50 on sale now for $13.65.
These toys not enough to float your boat, let alone elevate the little man? Never fear, we have a whole host of stimulating toys available during our Masturbation Month Sale, going strong, all month long!
We frequently find ourselves trapped by routine in all areas of our lives, and that can extend even to the most pleasurable activities. Whether you find yourself uninspired during your “me time” or you’re just looking for a new kind of kick, Fetish Friday is the day of the week during Masturbation Month when we examine kinky twists you can add to spice up your solo sessions.
This week we’ll be moving on up, talking about some great techniques and toys to titillate the nipples, from gentle brushing to extreme stimulation.
Sensation Play: Let’s start soft: If you have extremely sensitive nipples, you may not need much to heighten your enjoyment. Try gently brushing them with your fingers or a feather tickler. If you love the feel of leather, try drawing the tongue of a riding crop or suede flogger over your chest with one hand. Try a little temperature play with an ice cube, or an vibrating ice massager for extra thrills and chills!
Suck It Up: If you want or need a more intense feeling, try a suction device. Sucking sensations cause a joyous confusion of senses, but tend not to be painful. They run the gamut from simple nipple suckers, more complex suction cylinders or cupping sets to the ever popular and strong snake bite kit!
You May Feel A Slight Pinch: For solo play, you’ll want to keep one hand free to continue stoking the fire down below, so consider a toy or device that will allow for simultaneous tweaking and teasing with only one hand. Mandible Body Clamps are a great place to start for their adjustability and kung-fu grip. Japanese Clover Clamps are not adjustable, but give an intense sensation even when you aren’t tugging the chain. Finally, for the truly daring and devious amongst you, there is the incredibly intense Extreme Talon Nipple Clamps.
Nipple toys are a great way to easily expand the horizons of your pleasure. Start off with some simple pinching and prodding, or finding little things around the house to help amp up your alone time. We’ll be exploring other complimentary methods of modern self-love every Friday in May, as we celebrate Masturbation Month with our month long sale, special offers, contests and more!
I’m kinky, for sure. But when I was asked to explore the KinkLab Neon Wand® Electrosex Kit I was intimidated.
This is a toy that creates an electrical discharge across the surface of the skin and it is visually stunning. It plays with your senses. When you turn it on, the glass attachments (also called electrodes) glow violet or red. Watching the electricity dance inside the glass tubes and on the skin is totally mesmerizing. Turn the lights down low and the glow is more intense. It is a beautiful way to amplify your lover’s anticipation, be it fear or excitement.
The wand itself is plastic and comes neatly packed in a case. Each glass attachment sits safely in its own foam compartment. I love the little user manual that comes with it. The manual clearly outlines safety, care and play. All you have to do is pick the attachment of your choice, pop it in the end of the wand, plug the wand in, turn it on and you are ready to play. So simple.
The static electric sensations it delivers can go from subtle, warm and tingly, to focus, intense and even painful. You control how much sensation you want to deliver. There are a couple of reasons why the sensations can vary so greatly. First you have a setting dial on the wand itself. Second, the attachment you choose will also have an impact on the intensity.
The larger the attachment, the less sensation it gives because the electricity is spread out over the surface of the skin. So the comb shaped electrode delivers the least amount of sensation, while the 90° Probe is the most intense because the pointed tip delivers all the focus to one pin-pointed spot. The kit comes with four electrodes to choose from. There are three more electrodes sold separately.
You can play with the dial, attachments, how close you are to your partner’s skin and see for yourself. You can also amp the sensation up even more by applying massage oil or lotion to the skin.
Take it all a few steps further by adding the Power Tripper to your kit. Pop the end of the Power Tripper into your wand, tuck the metal disk into your bra, panties, boot or wherever it can sit flush to your skin, and then you become the conductor of sensation. Use your fingertips, your tongue or nipples to create sparks between you and your lover. Hold a metal toy (like a Wartenberg Pinwheel) in your hands and it becomes your conductor. The possibilities are endless.
I love the variable settings, it’s light weight in my hands and when compared to comparable items, it feel less fragile. In terms of hygiene, you never have to touch the other person’s skin, or if you do touch skin you can swab it down with 75% alcohol. After a little research, an easy user manual, and a very willing guinea pig to explore with- I am a total convert!
Pair it with some restraints or a blindfold and watch your lover squirm with the sensations.
My ultimate Valentines date plan? Start right now. Tell your partner that you have something planned. Have them set February 14th aside. Tell them they’ll need to dress sexy, but don’t tell them what you have planned. You want to stir up anticipation because anticipation hot!
Your goal is to spoil yourself and spoil your lover. On Valentine’s day I want you to give yourself plenty of time to prepare. Take some time to make yourself feel sexy.
All sex play starts with your skin. When shaving, avoid harsh scents that can irritate your skin. Instead use a quality shave cream like JO Shaving Cream Women Pure or JO Shaving Cream Men Adrenaline. You’ll have no bumps, rash or irritation, even in your most sensitive areas.
One of my absolute favorite after bath rituals? Kama Sutra Honey Dust Body Powder. It inhibits sweat, tastes sweet and is never sticky. After you towel off, powder any spots you want to feel your lover’s lips. Or get a Kama Sutra Weekender Kit and get a taste of this and more of the inspiring treats Kama Sutra makes. Then go on to primp and dress nice. If you feel sexy, you are sexy.
Prepare light, sexy nibbles; think chocolate, cheese, fruit and drinks of your choice. You can then feed each other and then move right into the sex! Yes, before dinner.
One of the biggest mistakes we make on a date is to save sex for the end of the evening. By that point you’ve had a big meal, you are half drunk, you are tired. I want you to get it on when you are little hungry, while your energy level is high. I want you to get your heart beating and muscles working and your skin all flush. All before dinner!
But again, be ready for awesome sex. Have condoms within reach. (Kitchen drawer, hand bag, glove box or anywhere you may want to get it on! Kimono is one of my favorite brands. If you have a massive cock (some people do!) they have larger sizes too.
Think about the things that light the two of you up. If you like erotica, get a copy of Sweet Life Erotic Fantasies for Couples and read to each other. Or read it before Valentines, highlight your favorite parts and give it your lover as a gift.
Do you like to give and receive massages? Get a fresh bottle of massage oil. I love Kama Sutra Massage Oil Sweet Almond. It’s a light scent that is perfect for all genders. You’ll spoil each other, feel good and smell luscious.
Like it a little more rough? I hope so. And if so, you might want to take a look at this blindfold, wrist restraints, ankle restraints and collar with hearts inlayed. You might also want this red heart paddle or the braided red crop. Go ahead- torture them with love, lust, pain or pleasure. You want to make sure they’ll never forget where they got those gifts!
Once you have turned each other upside down, it’s time for dinner. You can cook something you both love, order in or go to your favorite restaurant. Best of all, you can feast upon each other; skin all flush, panties wet, body relaxed and with lust in your hearts.
Make sure to visit our Valentine’s Day Sale for great savings on all the gear you need to make your night one to remember!
Sex Furniture: Sex Toys You Can Sit On
Sex swings and slings are designed to help the user attain and hold different sex positions. They are the best-known, most popular type of sex furniture – a whole category of sexual aids large enough to support the weight of the person using them, ranging from specially-angled cushions like Liberator Shapes, to BDSM furniture that facilitates bondage and other kinds of fetish play, to fucking machines.
Several contemporary styles of sex furniture have actually existed for centuries, but sex swings may be the first that was actually intended for pleasure. Many furnishings used today for erotic play, especially those used for BDSM, are descended from medieval European devices created for torture or corporal punishment. Sex swings, though, were developed in classical India, as a means of helping less athletic people attain difficult but rewarding sexual positions. It is believed that the earliest models were simple and rather uncomfortable rope and pulley constructions, and required assistants to keep the user from having an accident in the unstable device.
Modern sex slings and swings are no longer the haphazard balancing act they were in ancient days. Instead, they’re now carefully designed to increase the comfort of the user, cradling tired limbs and distributing weight correctly to increase endurance and gratification in even the most unusual sex positions. Because of this, all types of couples, from those with differing body sizes, to some who may be physically limited, can enjoy the benefits of using a sling to have a more gratifying sexual experience. However, no matter how physically fit you are, the support and leverage of a sling allows you to achieve positions and moves that are impossible unaided. Check out the overview of different types of slings and swings below, then read on to discover how to use them!
Two Types of Sex Swings
Hammock sex swings are suspended from the ceiling on support straps and are large enough to sit or lie back on. They’re ergonomic and as comfortable to lounge in as the traditional hammocks they’re named after… but you’re likely to get a lot more recreation than rest in them!
Hammock slings usually come with attachable stirrups, and may have either 3 or 4 attachment points. Sexy black leather sex swings are a BDSM classic. A quality leather sling will last for years, breaking in and becoming even more comfortable with continued use. For your safety and to get the most out of your investment make sure to only buy a sex swing made of thick, heavy-duty leather – thin, cheaper hides can be dangerous as they can stretch out and even come apart at the stress points. Leather sex slings can either be made of a solid, single hide, or they can be made of an open web of strips that allow access to the user’s backside, like this web style leather sex swing featured on the first season of “American Horror Story”. Both styles are roughly rectangular, with four attachment points to help prevent torqueing and provide maximum stability, and a leather pillow plus a set of leather stirrups to hoist your legs high are both included.
If you’d prefer a sex sling that really swings, one with 3 attachment points like the Stockroom’s exclusive Pig Sling will allow you to really put the sway in your sex! The Pig Sling got its name because you can be totally messy in it and simply wipe it down afterwards! It’s made of heavyweight black vinyl-coated polyester, so unlike leather slings, which are porous, this swing is moisture-resistant and can be cleaned with any antimicrobial spray cleanser that’s safe for use on surfaces having direct contact with skin. Because it’s so much easier to sanitize them, sex swings of synthetic material like the Pig Sling can be a more hygienic choice if you like to play filthy, or simply want to play with multiple partners.
Travel sex swings & sex harnesses still offer a lot of support but are small enough to fit in a suitcase, so they’re even more portable than a traditional hammock sling on a stand. Travel slings don’t need to be installed – instead, they’re shaped more like harnesses, and they support and lift the user’s legs by suspending them in heavy straps that pass around the back of the neck.
This type of sling is fastened around the body; you don’t need to climb in or be lifted in, the way you would with a hammock swing. Because of this, they are often easier to use for those using a sex swing due to limited mobility issues. They’re also ideal for those who need to be discreet, since they can be tucked away in a drawer. Choose from simpler models that just support weight from the thighs, like the Deluxe Portable Leather Thigh Sling, or try the more versatile Travel Sling with Stirrups, which actually uses adjustable buckling cuffs in place of regular stirrups to support and lift legs from the ankles.
How to Hang a Sex Swing
Hammock swings can be hung on chains from eyebolts in the ceiling, but you must use hardware that’s sturdy enough, and should choose your securement points carefully. You can avoid a trip to the hardware store and buy heavy steel chain, thick carabiners, and other installation accessories at competitive prices from The Stockroom when you purchase your sling. Whether planning to sit or lie in it, most people prefer to hang their sling so that the head rests higher than the feet, but you should experiment to find the height and stance that work best for you. To make your sling as versatile as possible, use longer chains and suspend the sling with carabiners or snap hooks so you can easily and quickly unfasten and adjust it.
If you don’t have a good place to hang a hammock style sling – or if you simply would rather not have it out in front of the family and general public at all times of day – try this steel-framed 4 Point Sling Stand, which sets up in seconds and breaks down for storage in the enclosed duffel bag. The footprint is only 4′ X 6″ when fully assembled, and since it only weighs 45 pounds, you can even travel with it or use it to bring your sling to a party!
Helpful Hint: Never fold a sex swing; it will permanently crease. Instead, roll it up for storage.
Putting Your Ass in a Sling: 6 Sex Swing Positions + Tricks
Wondering how to use your sex swing? From the basic to the more adventurous and exotic, here are 6 sex swing positions and fun suggestions to try with a hammock-style sling:
- Standing Missionary: place the receiving partner on their back in the sling with their feet up in the stirrups and the other person standing in front of them. (This works best if you first position the sling so it hangs at the level of the standing partner’s pelvis.) For maximum access and comfort, the person in the swing should have their butt cheeks scooted down close to the bottom edge before you plunge in.
- Standing Doggy Style: a variation on the above with the recipient face down in the sling with their ass in the air.
- Standing (or Sitting) Oral: a sex swing can suspend your partner at the perfect height for you to perform long, luxurious oral on them without getting a crick in your neck! Simply adjust the sling so it hangs at face level for the giving partner, and have the recipient lie back.
- Floating Oral: this fun technique for gravity-defying oral sex works best on a person with a penis, since it makes it much easier for the person in the sling to maintain the connection. To try it, lower your sling so it’s right above the bed or floor with just enough room to lie underneath when the sling has weight in it. The lucky person getting the blowjob lies on their back under the swing, while their partner lies above them in the swing on their stomach, head hanging down and lips locked onto the goods of the person on the floor.
- Use Bondage Restraints: keep your partner where you want them by attaching bondage restraints to the large D rings in the corners of your sex swing that attach it to the chains. Buckling wrist and ankle cuffs work best; fasten them to the sling with snap hooks.
- Stimulate With Sensation Play Toys: sensation toys tickle, tease, and tingle, so they’re great to use on someone in a sling. Try a simple ostrich feather tickler, or a pair of Vampire Gloves. These special leather gloves have small prickly points on the fingertips that feel super-sensual when stroked lightly on bare skin; press harder for a distinct sting.
The Pig Sling allows a comfortable position and easy access to give and receive oral sex.
Tease, torture & pleasure your partner with restraints in a Web Style Sex Swing.
Urban Legends & Sex Swings: The Chinese Basket Trick
The Chinese Basket Trick is a fascinating urban legend that some folks claim is possible to achieve with a sex swing. This technique supposedly had its start in the red light districts of the Far East. A seated woman was completely enclosed in a basket with a hole cut in the bottom, and the basket was lowered on a tightly wound rope until the bottom was right over the cock of a man lying on the floor below, allowing her to spin above him as the rope unwound.
We can’t quite imagine how to make the Basket Trick work with a sex swing, though perhaps you could position your partner strategically in a web style sling made of openwork straps. If you’re really committed to trying the Basket Trick, a suspension bar might be more workable. Either way, it certainly sounds like a lot of fun to try… and if you’re successful, please do let us know!