Happy Fisting Day 2014!

Curious about vaginal fisting? You should be! It’s a magical, sacred and extremely sexy experience for both parties involved. I am by no means an expert, just a sex nerd who likes to dabble in various perverted acts. I will share tips to keep in mind for vaginal fisting, as well as explain from my perspective as a submissive how fisting can bring a kinky scene to the next level.

So, first things first. If you anticipate fisting in your near future here are some things to keep in mind:

 • Hygiene: Fisters, don’t even think about it if you’ve got long nails! Can you say ouch?! Even if your partner eroticizes pain, vaginal tissues are sensitive and you don’t want to risk small tears and the chance of infection. Keep nails short and clean. If you can’t part with long nails or just flat out forgot to trim them you can wear gloves with cotton balls inside the tips. This will reduce the chance of the gloves ripping as well as your partner experiencing any uncomfortable scratches.

 • Safer sex: Wearing latex or nitrile gloves can prevent the exchange of fluids and can prevent the transmission of STI’s and other infections. Gloves are also helpful for individuals with long or painted nails. Even if you aren’t into medical fetishes, gloves can be sexy! With some Pavlovian conditioning, the sight of a glove may make cause some intense sexual arousal.

 • Consent and Communication: Vaginal fisting may not be on everyone’s checklist of activities they want to engage in, so it’s important to get clear consent before attempting to do so. It is also important to ask questions; “Are you interested in giving? Receiving? Do you have any medical conditions that may potentially be a problem? Do you have a safe word?” There are some risks involved in vaginal fisting, so it is important to be well informed. If you do have any concerns, consult a physician (don’t fear there are several directories of kink aware physicians who won’t judge). Lastly, communicate throughout the whole process. If you aren’t in the mood on a particular night, speak up! During the act, fistee’s communicate about wants, needs, and how it is feeling. Fisters, you can help out too by prompting communication with questions like, “Is this okay? Would you like another finger now? Faster?”

 • Slow and Slippery: Fisting shouldn’t be a race. The anticipation and build up to the end result of a whole fist inside someone’s cunt is part of the fun. Take your time and don’t be discouraged if the first time, or second, or fifth time isn’t successful. On top of taking your time, be liberal with the lube, and yes, lube is necessary! I’d recommend a silicone lubricant, oil based lube (beware with latex barriers though), or a thick water-based gel. Keep reapplying, even if you don’t think you need more because the less friction the better.

Some people may want a mellow, slow and sensual environment for their fisting experiences, while others may want something a little more intense or kinky. Allowing someone to put their entire fist inside of you requires trust, vulnerability, and communication. The fistee may feel they are ultimately submitting to the fister, or they may feel that they are constantly in control of how much of their partner they take into their cunt. As the receiver I feel that being fisted by someone is one of my greatest acts of submission. I am offering my pussy to be used. I am giving a priceless gift to my partner. As the giver I feel a great responsibility to communicate with my partner and reassure them that they are in a good place and taking the experience well. Vaginal fisting alone is one of the greatest connections I’ve felt with another partner, but combining kink with fisting is an experience that I can count on to bring me to subspace.

Some ways you can make your fisting experience a little kinkier:

 • Use a vibrator: I have to say the most intense orgasm I’ve had to this day was with a hand in my cunt and a Hitachi on my clit. Or try a vibrator with lower speeds and increase the power gradually if the Hitachi Magic Wand is too strong for you.

 • Bondage: Being bound by rope or restraints or held open by someone strong can really intensify those feelings of vulnerability and submissiveness. There may be some points in the fisting process that the fistee may want to wiggle away and stop, but the bondage will keep them in place and help them get through those difficult seconds.

 • Blindfolds or hoods: This can help you focus less on your physical environment and more on what’s happening inside you, quite literally as well as emotionally.

 • Sensation Play: Candle wax, nipple clamps, nipple/clit pumps, breath play, etc. The possibilities are endless! I would advise against using gags during fisting, even if both players are very experienced. Each experience is different and both the giver and receiver should be able to clearly communicate their needs and whether something is not working for them.

Happy fisting!

Essential Tools of the Dominant Woman

Her voice drops to a low purr as she leans into her beloved submissive. Her eyes narrow and lips curl into a mischievous grin. She whispers her desires and makes demands to satisfy her whims. Perhaps she feeds off moans of sensual suffering. Perhaps she seeks sexual satisfaction. Maybe she’d like pampering and amusement. This is her time. Because it’s her time, where she speaks and gets what delights her, it’s also their time. It’s a bubble of time and space where no one and nothing else matters. It is a gift to their relationship of clarity, simplicity, authenticity, confidence of belonging and pleasure.

There are four essential tools that the dominant woman needs to make this magic time happen. I also want to share with you three simple and clever tools that make the dominant woman’s play time so much easier and sweeter – more on this later!

The fundamental tools are; your voice, your gaze, your touch and your walk.

Your Voice:
Your voice sets the tone. Gives cue to the bottom on what you share now and where you may take them. Don’t rush it. Drop your voice and slow down the speech a little. If you don’t know what to say, say nothing. Silence makes bottoms squirm. Saying wicked things, hot breath in the ear, with sweet tones creates delightful dilemmas. Your voice is unique – soon your bottom will come to associate that particular tone of your voice with their happy, fun, bottom space.

Your Touch:
Your touch wakes up their senses to the moment and to your intention. Gentle caress makes their skin tingle. Rough grabs put them on alert. Stinging slaps and pinches may be rewards or punishments, depending on how their appetites run.

Your Gaze:
Your gaze reminds them that they must be present and in the here and now. The smiling eyes encouraging a bottom maybe extra strength they need to sweetly suffer through an ordeal. The gaze averted maybe a cruel denial.

Your Walk:
Practice the infamously effective “Queen’s Walk” We practice this form of movement in ForteFemme. Pull your spine up, roll your shoulders back, proudly bring your chest up and tighten your core. Put your weight on your back foot. Then walk slowly. Lock your gaze on your partner. With each step you take, take a breath. Yes, it’s that slow. It sets the tone. It sets the understanding of who owns that time and space in the moment. It’s a great tool of creating confidence in the woman and setting the stage for the partner and the scene.
These are tools that you’ll want to practice and hone over time. At first you might feel awkward, but it will come to you in time. They are subtle but powerful tools.

So now for the fun and crafty tools to make your playtime easier and sweeter!

Blindfolds:
Blindfold is a top’s best friend! With a blindfold on, ever you do is always a surprise. With a blindfold on, they won’t know your expression of befuddlement as you try to figure out some new complicated toy – or when you kick off your heels!

Comfortable Chair:
Why be uncomfortable? Being uncomfortable is the prize for the bottoms. Not something you should endure. Once you’ve Queen’s Walked your way to your ecstatic bottom, enjoy creating and conducting the scene from a place of gorgeous comfort! If you really like the regal seating for play, you might consider selecting toys that are easy to use while seated.

Collection of Kinky Erotic Fiction:
Yes, fiction. Collect and read many, many kinky fiction books. There are so many quality ones out there beyond the ones that mass media repeats. Don’t forget Laura Antoniou’s books. Various anthologies with works from many writers are great. Ernest Greene has a new one out too.

These are both you and your partner to read. For you, it will illuminate what kind of play and mindset turns you on. For your partner, find out what story and which part they liked. Try to get them to tell you what they liked about it. This will give you a deeper idea of how their pleasures are mapped out – and can be far more illuminating than a standard negotiation.

Rachel’s Vibrator Corner: The KinkLab VibeRite

The Stockroom is proud of its many innovations in the industry; our KinkLab line features an array of classic bondage staples and toys perfect for beginners as well as those who prefer to keep it simple and functional. In honor of our 25th Anniversary, this recent episode of Vibrator Corner called attention to KinkLab’s version of a much-loved classic vibrator.

 
Rachel’s Vibrator Corner: The KinkLab VibeRite
Not only is this wand insanely powerful, it’s also wireless and completely portable!

Featured Product:

KinkLab VibeRite
The VibeRite® Personal Massager is a 7 speed, cordless massage wand with a soft silicone head and a pliable neck for a more personal massage.

Rachel’s Vibrator Corner: Stronic Drei

In the latest episode of our vibrator series, Rachel demos Fun Factory’s newest pulsator, the Stronic Drei.

 
Rachel’s Vibrator Corner: Stronic Drei
Featuring deep ridges and a flared base ideal for anal play, this pulsator mimics the motions of sex and raises the bar for high-end sex toys!

Featured Product:

Fun Factory Stronic Drei
Rather than the buzzing associated with traditional toys, the Drei is a pulsator and produces a thrusting motion, making it possible to insert and use hands-free.

Looking For Lube Video Round-Up

There are new lubricants hitting the shelves every day, making it a bit frustrating to choose the one that is right for you. In spirit of the holidays, we’d like to offer some suggestions for the perfect stocking stuffer!

 
Water-Based
Water-based lubricant is extremely versatile in that it ranges from thin and slippery to thick and long-lasting.

Featured Products:

Pjur Basic Water Formulation $10.95
Pjur Basic is water-based and condom safe, long lasting, slick and light.
Sliquid Organics Gel $13.99-$22.99
Water based with natural and botanical ingredients, this lube contains no glycerin, parabens, or petroleum. It is hypoallergenic, non-staining, and also 100% vegan.

 
Silicone-Based
Silicone lubricant has amazing staying power and is ideal for anal play.

Featured Products:

Pjur Bodyglide Original Gel $19.75
Pjur Gel is designed for multiple uses, and is also a skin conditioner, moisturizer and a therapeutic massage formula, appropriate for daily use.
Swiss Navy Silicone Lubricant $16.95-$99.00
Useful for shining your rubber or lubing up for some rough-and-tumble, this high quality silicone lube is perfect for all styles of play, and completely latex compatible.

 
Hybrids
Hybrid lubricants combine the best of both worlds – the staying power of silicone with the natural feel of water-based.

Featured Product:

Liquid Silk $7-$17
Liquid Silk is a luxury, non tacky, hybrid personal lubricant which will assist and enhance sexual intercourse, intimate massage and foreplay.

Rachel’s Vibrator Corner: Sakura by Tenga

Whether you’re a sex toy novice or a seasoned collector, today’s selection of vibrators can be overwhelming. The Stockroom’s Rachel Takiko, a self-proclaimed sex toy nerd, began doing a weekly series in November highlighting some of the shop’s most interesting (and efficient) vibrators. We hope you find them informative and helpful in finding one that’s perfect for you!

 
Sakura by Tenga
Featuring a soft indent to cradle the clit, the Sakura is one of Tenga’s three innovative, discreet massagers for women.

Featured Product:

Sakura Iroha Vibe
The slight indent at the tip of the Sakura makes this tantalizing toy perfect for those who want a cradling, squeezing, pleasing experience, ideal for clit and labia play.

A Few Quick Facts About Prostate Cancer and You

We’re midway through Movember Prostate Week, and while we’ve covered prostate toys, and an introduction to prostate play, we wanted to take a moment to talk about the elephant in the room: Prostate Cancer.

According to statistics compiled by the American Cancer Society, approximately 1 in 6 men will be diagnosed with prostate cancer during their lifetime. Although that’s a fairly daunting statistic, the survival rates for men diagnosed at any stage of prostate cancer progression range from 93-99% over a 5 to 15 year period following diagnosis. The best course of treatment begins with early detection, so if you’re a man over 40, make sure you are getting regular prostate exams.

Stay healthy, happy, and kinky!

Author and Educator Charlie Glickman Presents: Prostate Play!

Charlie Glickman

Are you ready to discover a new way to have amazing sex? More men and their partners are experimenting with prostate massage or pegging, and they’re finding out how much pleasure it can bring.

If you’re like most folks, when you hear the word “prostate,” you probably think of prostate health concerns like cancer. But what you might not know is that the prostate is also one of the most sensitive erogenous zones that men have. In fact, it’s remarkably similar to the G-spot. Think about everything you’ve heard about the G-spot, and then consider what it would be like to for men to be able to enjoy the same pleasures. Some of the ways that men describe orgasms from prostate play are that they feel bigger, more full-body, more expansive, and more diffuse than the focused sensations of a penis orgasm. Sounds pretty amazing, doesn’t it?

Of course, prostate sensations can also feel fantastic even before orgasm. Imagine that feeling that happens when you’re about to ejaculate. You know the one- it’s the “point of no return.” In that moment, the prostate is contracting in order to produce a portion of the fluid in semen. Now, instead of having that feeling for just a few seconds, imagine that it’s going on for half an hour, or even longer. Prostate massage can feel like you’re on the verge of an orgasm for as long as you want, which is a wonderful experience.

Getting Started

The Male Anatomy

The easiest way to find the prostate is to insert a lubricated finger into the anus and then curl it towards the navel. The prostate is about 3-4” in from the opening of the anus, but don’t worry if your finger is shorter than that. If you insert it all the way and then press in further, the flexibility of the pelvic floor will let you reach a bit more.

You’re looking for a round object that feels like a ripe plum. Don’t go poking for it- that can bruise the prostate just like it would bruise a plum. Instead, gently press along the midline of his body until you find it. The prostate fills with fluid during arousal, which makes it get bigger like a water balloon, so you might have an easier time finding it if you get him turned on first. There’s also a groove running down the prostate from top to bottom, and it’s possible to have your finger in that groove and not be able to feel anything. Try moving a little to the left or right and you’ll feel it more easily.

You can massage the prostate with a finger or two, just like the G-spot. Try making a “come here” motion, tapping, circling, or sliding in and out while pressing it. Just be sure to have short fingernails and remember: stroke, don’t poke. You can also massage his penis at the same time. It works best if you can keep your motions in sync, so if that’s difficult, either slow down until you can match them up or have him stroke himself and focus on his prostate.

For the guy on the receiving end, there are a few possible sensations to look for. Some guys feel amazing pleasure right away. If that happens for you, awesome! Some guys first notice that it feels like they need to urinate. That means that you’re on the spot, so dial the pressure down a bit. And some men say that they didn’t feel much of anything the first few times they tried it. It can take a little practice to tune into the sensations. One good way to do that is to combine prostate massage with a familiar pleasure like oral sex or a handjob. That gets your body used to the new experience and makes it more likely that the next time will be different.

Tools & Techniques

Black Dragon Gloves and The Aneros SPX

Wear a glove to keep things clean, and use plenty of lubricant. Silicone lubricants last longer than water-based lubes, though water-based products rinse off more easily in the shower. Use a thinner lube like Wet Platinum for a slick ride or try a thicker lube like System Jo Premium Anal Lubricant to give you a little extra cushioning. Go nice and slow, and be sure to get your partner turned on before going in. Arousal makes penetration much easier. Remember – you need to seduce the ass.

Most men find that a dildo with a curved shaft or a bulbous head works really well for prostate massage. Aim the curve towards your navel in order to reach the spot. You can experiment with different angles, amounts of pressure, sliding in and out, or jostling the dildo so it vibrates on your prostate. And of course, women can wear a harness to make penetration easy.

There are lots of vibrators that make the prostate feel fantastic. Look for a toy that focuses the vibration at the tip, and make sure it has a wide base to keep it from slipping all the way in and getting lost.

If you want an amazing, hands-free prostate massage, try one of the Aneros massagers. The upward curved end of the base goes towards the front of the body, with the tip resting on the bulb of the penis (behind the testicles). When you have it in place, with the shaft pressing into the prostate, contract your pelvic floor. The most effective way to do that is to squeeze the muscles that make your erection bounce. Every time you do, the anus will pull up and the shaft of the Aneros will lever forward into your prostate for an amazing time.

You can use the Aneros during solo sex, while receiving a blowjob, or even during intercourse, as long as it’s free to move. The MGX is a great one to start with because the hard plastic makes it easy to work with. If you do your Kegel exercises and have good control over your muscles, the Eupho is incredible, but it’s less effective if you aren’t as practiced with your Kegels.

Some buttplugs work for prostate massage, especially if they can be angled towards the navel. They don’t move as much on their own, but if you like firm, constant pressure, they’re a good bet.

Health & Safety

Prostate Pleasure by Charlie Glickman

Here are two important toy tips. One: make sure that your anal toys are smooth. There are lots of G-spot toys with bumps and ridges that feel great in the vagina, but they’ll be too rough for anal use. Two: get something that’s non-porous and easy to clean, like silicone, or cover your toy with a condom all the way over the base. Hygiene is extra important for anal play, for obvious reasons.

Some men enjoy having an orgasm during prostate play, while others like it as a warm-up before switching to something else as they get close. There’s no right or wrong here, so try different things to see what feels best to you. It’s pretty common for men to ejaculate more during a prostate massage, since you’re squeezing more of the fluid out of the gland.

With all of the amazing pleasure potential in the prostate, it’s good to know that it may also have some important health benefits. Massage increases blood flow, releases muscle tension, helps break up blockages and trapped fluid in the gland, and can even improve some of the symptoms associated with an enlarged prostate (benign prostatic hyperplasia). However, if you think you may have a prostate health concern, please get checked out by a doctor.

Looking for more info about prostate massage, pegging, and how to have explosive orgasms? Check out The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure: Erotic Exploration for Men and Their Partners by Charlie Glickman PhD and Aislinn Emirzian. It has all the tips and tools you need to get the most fun out of your prostate!

How To: The Chest Tie Video Tutorial

We’ve saved the best for last!

The fifth and final installment of our rope bondage tutorials for National Kink Month features Victor Lightworship performing the beautiful and much-coveted rope chest harness. This exquisite tie separates and frames the breasts perfectly, creating an attractive, comfortable binding.

Enjoy all the videos in this series: The Rope Cuff, The Wrist Tie, The Crotch Tie, and The Leg Tie!

Hemp Rope $25.00-$46.00
These hand-conditioned natural hemp rope sets are firm but not too rough, and ideal for Kinbaku (Shibari), or any other suspension and rope play you might dream up!
KinkLab Safety Scissors $11.95
Perfect as a pair of emergency release rope bondage scissors, these are a must for anyone practicing safe and sane play.
Strictly Bondage $24.95
Tied up with expertly applied knots, these innocent young creatures are at the tantalizing mercy of their lascivious onlookers. At 128 pages, this elaborate hardcover book presents the most delectable babes in various states of bondage.

How To: The Leg Tie Video Tutorial

Part 4 of our 5 Part rope bondage video turtorial demonstrates Victor Lightworship’s preferred leg-tying method for maximum aesthetic appeal and practical applications. Victor takes you slowly, step-by-step through the process of creating a complex-looking, beautiful restraint that will securely hold your partner’s leg bound thigh-to-calf, with no chance of movement.

Skin Diamond assists Victor as the very willing, very naked bound partner in this 4 minute tutorial.

Enjoy all the videos in this series: The Rope Cuff, The Wrist Tie, The Chest Tie, and The Crotch Tie!

Get all the gear featured in this video:

Hemp Rope $25.00-$46.00
These hand-conditioned natural hemp rope sets are firm but not too rough, and ideal for Kinbaku (Shibari), or any other suspension and rope play you might dream up!
KinkLab Safety Scissors $11.95
Perfect as a pair of emergency release rope bondage scissors, these are a must for anyone practicing safe and sane play.
Strictly Bondage $24.95
Tied up with expertly applied knots, these innocent young creatures are at the tantalizing mercy of their lascivious onlookers. At 128 pages, this elaborate hardcover book presents the most delectable babes in various states of bondage.