Last week the gorgeous Athena Fatale graced us with her musings on teasing aspect of tease and denial. This week, she finishes it off with some thoughts and hints on denial. Will it be a happy ending, or a frustrating brush off? Read on for the thrilling conclusion!
Do you ever want something so bad you can’t stand it? You fantasize about it and obsess over it, it consumes your every thought and motivates your every action until finally, at long last, you either achieve success or suffer a crushing defeat. If you reach your goal, the satisfaction is so sweet that you can revel in it for days, replaying the moment in your mind and reliving the victory over and over. A crushing defeat can heighten your determination to be successful in your next venture, pushing you to greater and more satisfying accomplishments that far surpassed your original goal.
Sex can be much the same way. Whether you are enjoying sex alone or with a partner, or partners, a little tease and denial really ratchets up the intensity. We are sexual creatures, and once our senses are aroused it is hard to turn back. Anyone who’s ever heard a boy carry on about ‘blue balls’ knows that they certainly don’t enjoy turning back. That doesn’t mean you can’t have fun insisting they do! As a Dominatrix, I find that there is little my slaves won’t do if they think there might be a chance for an orgasm in their future. Sometimes I like to play a little game where I make my slave stroke himself to the brink of orgasm then stop abruptly and assume the position for 20 strokes with the cane, with additional strikes given for whining or complaining. We repeat this until I am satisfied he can no longer take any more, and I most likely send him on his way with a swollen ass and swollen, aching balls. This is great fun for me, a sadistic game of give and take for my own personal amusement.
Tease and denial can be quite sadistic even without the added caning. Is there anything worse than being on the verge of orgasm but unable to achieve climax? I think not. Vibrators can be just the thing to push you or your partner over the edge, or in this case just close enough to almost go over… but not until you say so. One of my favorite vibrators on the market right now is the VibeRite from KinkLab. It’s incredibly powerful and offers 7 speed settings so you can control just how much, or how little vibration your partner receives. Use it externally to warm things up, then add one of the attachments that provide G-spot or P-spot stimulation to take the sexual intensity to the next level. Many people can climax quickly with a VibeRite, so switch to a low setting and light strokes to prevent an unintended orgasm.
Just the tip, he says? We’ve all heard that before. Now thanks to the Cobra Libre by Fun Factory,’just the tip’ is all he’ll get! This male masturbator is designed to stimulate the most sensitive part of the penis – the head. Use the vibration settings to work your partner in to a frustrated frenzy then negotiate your terms for letting them release. Since this toy is specifically designed to stimulate only the glans and the frenulum, it leaves the lower shaft and testicles free for additional stimulation. Whether that additional stimulation is painful or pleasurable depends on you. Use your hands and mouth if you’re feeling nice, or add some clothespins or a prickly Wartenberg Pinwheel if you’re not! Mix it up to keep your partner on their toes and ready to explode from frustration.
Tips for delaying or denying orgasm:
• Monitor breathing and body language. Watch for signs of pleasure and allow positive reactions to continue for brief periods of time and increase in intensity, but stop before climax is reached. Ask your partner to verbally communicate when they are close to orgasm if needed.
• Have your partner rate their arousal on a scale of 1-10, with 10 being an orgasm. Instruct them to masturbate themselves to a 7 before stopping, then an 8, then 9. Each time they come closer to their goal it becomes more and more frustrating, and increasingly difficult to stop. Sexual frustration is the name of this game. Enjoy it, you sick bastard.
• Bondage is perfect for tease and denial. Tie your partner to the bed and use a vibrator or masturbator to bring them close to orgasm, then stop and make them beg for more. Better yet, make them earn it!
• When incorporating rope bondage in your tease and denial play, give your partner just enough slack to masturbate with one hand. When they get close to orgasm, pull the rope taught so that they can no longer reach their fun parts. Laughing at their discomfort is optional.
• Counter an approaching orgasm with a shock to the system. Ice cubes, nipple clamps, a wooden paddle – all of these things can disrupt the pleasure of sensory overload and ruin an orgasm before it’s time.
• Assign your partner a task to complete when they are close to orgasm. It’s hard to climax when you have to recite the Pledge Of Allegiance, or sing the Star Spangled Banner.
It’s human nature to want what we can’t have, and there is nothing we want more than sexual gratification. A greedy pig will gobble up whatever is in front of him without ever taking the time to really appreciate what he has. Your orgasm is the food that nourishes you; take your time and enjoy it to it’s fullest. Savor each delicious bite, let it fill every inch of your body. Because if you don’t eat your dinner, someone just might take it away.